It Will Destroy Her
by ladyasgardian
Summary: Oneshot. Season 3. What if Thea found out she killed Sara in a different way?


Thea silently walked through Verdant, thankful for having the sense to swap her heels out for sneakers. She was wearing her sleuth outfit, complete with her favorite pair of leggings and an old hoodie. Finally she was going to figure out what Oliver was hiding in the club's basement. Her club, really. The time of hiding things from her was over.

She approached the hall leading to the basement door, taking care to make her footsteps light. As she got closer, she heard the door open. Thinking fast, she backtracked, and rushed to hide behind the staircase. Thea crossed her fingers, hoping that she wouldn't be discovered. There was no way to explain why she was here instead of her manicure appointment. And in tennis shoes.

Holding her breath, she peered out from behind the staircase. She watched unsurprised as Roy and Oliver exited from the hallway. Of course her brother and her ex-boyfriend would be in cahoots together. They always have been. But as they got closer, Thea pulled back from her position, not wanting to risk looking out. Simply listening to their conversation will have to suffice.

"What are we going to do, Oliver?" she heard Roy ask. It sounded like he stopped at the bar.

"I don't know," her brother answered with a sigh. Thea released her breath. They were chatting. Good.

"I don't get it," Roy said. "She doesn't know? Should we tell her?"

"No!" Oliver answered sharply. His voice echoed through the empty club, almost startling Thea, but she held her position firmly.

"No," she heard her brother repeat. "Thea can never find out."

She stiffened at the mention of her name. Honestly, she shouldn't even be surprised that they were actively hiding something from her. She clenched her jaw, and forced down the anger that was rising inside her. She needed to hear everything before she confronted them.

"Oliver," Roy said softly, almost too quiet for Thea to hear. "I know this isn't my place. But she deserves to know what Merlyn did to her." Merlyn? What was his part in all this?

"Roy," she heard Oliver say, and then a pause. She waited. "If she finds out she killed Sara, it will destroy her."

Her breath got caught in her throat, but she resisted the urge to jump out then and there. That was impossible. She needed a moment to think. She closed her eyes and focused on her breathing. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. She killed Sara.

Her eyes flew open. She killed Sara Lance. It couldn't be true. Yet the idea didn't seem foreign to her. Merlyn trained her to be a killer. She was perfectly capable of murdering someone. Murdering someone like Sara. And her brother wouldn't lie about this. Hot tears spilled onto Thea's cheeks. She needed to leave.

She looked from behind the staircase, and saw Oliver and Roy heading back to the basement. Logically, she knew she should follow them to discover the passcode, but at the moment she could barely breathe. The mystery in the basement is for another day.

Once she heard their voices disappear, she ran up the staircase and into her office. Thea took care to close the door quietly, avoiding any attention to herself. She needed to be alone. She needed time to process this. This couldn't be happening. She sat down against the wall near her desk, bringing her knees to her chest. Thea focused on the humming of the lights, the blare of a faint police siren blocks away. She felt the cotton of her hoodie, and how the warmth it provided contrasted to the chilly air. She thought about her brother's words. _If she finds out she killed Sara, it will destroy her._ Hugging her knees, Thea bent her head and cried.

She cried until her tear ducts ran dry. She cried until her throat burned and her nose ran. Until her head ached and her body wouldn't stop shaking. Until her eyes were swollen and her sleeves dampened. She wanted to curl up in a ball and let the floor swallow her whole. She wanted anything to numb the hollowness she felt inside. She killed Sara. Laurel's sister. Her friend. Thea hugged her legs tighter and tucked her head in further. She couldn't stop sobbing.

She barely registered a faint knocking on her door. Hesitantly, she lifted her head.

"Thea?" she heard her brother call out. Thea had no energy for an answer, and simply stared at the door.

"Thea, I'm coming in." The door flew open, and Oliver stepped inside. The two made eye contact, and before Thea could blink he was knelt down at her side, concern etched on his face.

"Speedy," her brother said, grabbing her shoulder. It should have comforted her, but she felt her heart break more. She wanted to tell him that she heard everything, but she couldn't speak. Her breaths came out as hard gasps, and her throat felt hoarse. Thea shook her head, knowing more tears were threatening to spill guilt. The devastation. It was all too much.

Oliver pulled her into a hug. It was awkward, her knees uncomfortably caught between the siblings. But she allowed herself to be enveloped, her body shaking from her sobs as she sagged against him. Thea buried herself into his shoulder, not even deterred by the strong smell of sweat. She killed Sara. She was a monster.

"It'll be okay," her brother whispered softly as he rocked her slowly, back and forth. He ran a hand through her hair and used his other hand to pull her closer. "It's gonna be okay."

She wished she could believe him.


End file.
